Sway
by Meiyume
Summary: V/P A little bit angsty. It's a songfic and umm I think it's pretty good. Just Pan's thoughts of Vegeta and the way they feel for each other...Please read and review!


**Disclaimer:** I don't own DB, DBZ or DBGT or any of it's characters. I don't own the song Sway by Bic Runga, but I love it! The only thing I own is this plot! :)

**A/N** Konnichiwa minna-san! This is a one-shot V/P, don't read if you don't like V/P. Tis a songfic and I'm kinda obsessed with the song now, I'm just listening to it over and over again. It really is a good song! Well hmm...got nothing much else to say! Please review! Ja!

Normal writing is present time, Italic is a memory or a flashback, Italic and bold is the song.

_Meiyume_

***

_**"Don't stray, don't ever go away   
I should be much too smart for this   
You know it gets the better of me"**_

I never knew why that song always came into my head whenever I woke up to my empty bed. My empty bed that once occupied the prince of Saiyans, and now occupied just me. I knew that he had to go, but I wished he could stay. But he had to go back to his…wife. How painful it was to say that, to even think about it.

Tears clouded my eyes and I quickly plunged my head into my pillow before they came. I hated the way I felt for him and the way I wasn't sure if there was anything more between us. I felt that something more but he probably didn't. I'm pretty positive about him being in love with his wife, yet I could be wrong. Wishful thinking was so bad for the heart.

_**"Sometimes, when you and I collide   
I fall into an ocean of you, pull me out in time   
Don't let me drown, let me down   
I say it's all because of you"**_

_As usual, here I was venturing around CC looking for Bra. If this place wasn't so damned big I would have found her by now. Dende knew where I was now. So now, I was just absent-mindedly walking through the desolate hallways of CC just…thinking._

Sensing someone I looked up, only to meet the deep, dark eyes of my prince. We stood just staring intently at each other. So many words spoken without a trace of sound. I could feel myself falling. Again. Falling for him. The eyes…it was the eyes that pushed me over the edge. I could fall for him a million times over. I probably have. I wish I wasn't in love with him. I wish someone would save me from these pointless feelings. But no one could, I was in too deep and there was no one who could swim that far just to get me out…at least I didn't think so.

I turned, enjoying the feel of my sheets against my bare skin, replaying that memory. I hated that memory of him, always haunting me. Don't know why, it was just that particular memory. Maybe because that was when I'd thought my dreams had come true, only to find my dreams had become real nightmares. This was all his fault!

_**"And here I go, losing my control   
I'm practising your name so I can say it to your face"**_

And here I am losing my mind, losing my common sense. Going insane. Only a few of the million ways to put it. His name even haunts my dreams. _Vegeta…Vegeta…Vegeta…_ It would be so much easier to hate him. Why couldn't he make me hate him? Why?

_**"It doesn't seem right, to look you in the eye   
Let all the things you mean to me   
Come tumbling out my mouth"**_

_I looked at him square in the eye, this couldn't go on until I knew where we stood. It was harder than it sounded. I couldn't just tell him! He looked at me impatiently. The timing was so wrong! This wasn't how I imagined to tell him how I felt. But I was determined to know what was happening._

"I-I…where do we stand exactly…?" I shifted nervously under his gaze.

Silence filled the air for what seemed like forever. Then finally, he spoke.

"Is it of importance, where our relationship stands? It's just sex." He replied.

I could feel the shattering pieces of my heart and that's when I knew that I'd fallen for something unobtainable. But I wasn't going to cry. Not now anyway.

"I-I well…" I trailed off.

"Do you feel something more brat?" He asked smirking.

"N-No! Of course not! I…just…" Love you…

He smirked, he probably knew the way I felt now. Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! I should've just shut up. I should have kept my mouth shut. As he turned and walked out of the room, it took all of my willpower not to cry.

Another memory that plagued my mind…This memory I hated even more than the first one. What had possessed me that day to attempt to tell him what I felt and hope that he felt the same way! I was so stupid and naïve then, although it wasn't that long ago…about eight months now. I'd asked him on the second month of our affair and after that, no more naïve Panny. I don't know if anyone else saw the change, but I knew that I had changed…for good.

_** "Indeed it's time to tell you why   
I say it's infinitely true"**_

He. Knew. He knew. Of course he did! After that naïve stunt I pulled of course he would know. Yet here he is using me and here I am letting him use me just for the small flame of hope that maybe if I hold onto him long enough he'd stay. For good.

_**"Say you'll stay, don't come and go   
Like you do   
Sway my way, yeah I need to know   
All about you"**_

_Another night, another night hoping that maybe it would be different. Maybe this time he'd stay and every night I was wrong. I was half-asleep when I felt the weight being shifted to my side and the warmth that was once there was now not. He was leaving again…I shivered slightly and curled up, to think it was summer and it was this cold! I only had a thin sheet protecting my naked body and my quilt was folded at the end of my bed._

Suddenly I felt the heaviness of my quilt being laid on top of me. I opened my eyes drowsily, to see my prince carefully laying the quilt on top of me, with so much concern and love in his eyes. Was I dreaming?

That was probably the only good memory I had of him. That night was somehow different to the others. He kissed me with a new passion, he made love to me with a new gentleness. But I didn't know why. But suddenly it all stopped. I wasn't sure why, but I think it happened that night I'd asked him to stay…

_This time I wasn't going to let him leave. This time I wasn't going to wait till he decided. This time I was going to ask him to stay. There'd been something so different in our lovemaking the past few days. I wasn't sure if it was the right thing to do, or if it was selfish and unfair to him, yet I felt the need to ask._

I felt a gentle rubbing on my stomach. It was his hand stroking me gently. He kissed me on the base of my neck before he began to get up.

"Stay." I stated clearly.

"What?" He asked dumbstruck.

"Stay." I said again.

He stared at me, I'm not sure, but I think I saw fear in those dark eyes of his. Fear of what? Finally he broke the eye contact and without saying anymore words he dressed and left. Once again my heart shattered.

_**"And there's no cure, and no way to be sure   
Why everything's turned inside out   
Instilling so much doubt"**_

The feeling had slowly come to me. The feeling that one night he would never come and that it'd all suddenly be over. Then I'd be treated like…just another girl? I didn't want that! I guess no girl wanted it. Yet that feeling remained, and there was nothing I could do about it.

_**"It makes me so tired   
I feel so uninspired"**_

Tired. That wasn't the word at all. More like exhausted. More like bordering enough. It was just so emotionally draining, the thing we had. Although all we did was physical, there was so much more to it. I'm almost sick of it, but the flame I hold in my heart for him keeps me hanging on, even by the littlest thread. And the love I have for him pushes me along the path of life.

_**"My head is battling with my heart   
My logic has been torn apart"**_

On the one hand, there's the right thing. To just stop this affair before it gets out of hand. On the other hand there's the wrong thing. To stay because…I love him. But isn't that the right thing? To follow your heart? Confusion is the best word to describe it. I wish I knew what to do, I wish…I don't know what I want anymore.

_**"And now it all turns sour   
Come sweeten every afternoon"**_

_"He treats me worse, Bra." I said to her._

"Who? Your boyfriend?" She asked, not knowing who my boyfriend was.

"Yeah. Sure when he comes over and we're alone he's sweet, but when we're around people he and I know, he acts like a bastard."

"Dump him." Bra stated simply as she applied lip gloss to her lips.

I wished it were that simple.

"Bra I'm…I'm in love with him."

I could hear the crack and tap as Bra dropped her lip gloss onto her tiled kitchen floor.

_**"Say you'll stay, don't come and go   
Like you do   
Sway my way, yeah I need to know   
All about you"**_

_"I asked him to stay last night." I told Bra._

"You mean he just uses you?" She asked shocked.

"Well…no. No!…yes." I told her nervously.

"And you know he uses you? You let him use you!"

"You don't understand Bra…I love him and…he's married with kids."

"What?! How could you just miss that simple little detail? Everyday you complain about him and everyday I tell you to dump him and every day you tell me you love him. Yet you managed to miss that out?!" She fumed.

"Well…" I trailed off.

I wanted to tell her. Bra I'm having an affair with your father. Just hot sex every night. That would go well.

"Okay…okay I overreacted…okay. Did he…stay?" She asked hesitantly.

"No."

_**"It's all because of you   
It's all because of you"**_

So naïve those words. That just proves that inside I'm still naïve little Panny, because I believe that it is his entire fault. It's all because of him.

_**"Now it all turns sour, come sweeten every afternoon   
It's time to tell you why, I say it's infinitely true "**_

_"Bra, I think he loves me, but he doesn't want to admit it because he's afraid of the consequences…"_

"Pan, any man who's married would be afraid of the consequences."

***

_**"Say you'll stay, don't come and go   
Like you do   
Sway my way, yeah I need to know   
All about you"**_

As we held each others sweaty bodies, my instilling doubt faded away. I felt that passion I'd felt a few months ago. That same passion, but this time I knew what it was. It was love and stronger than the last time. He kissed my forehead and smirked.

"Vegeta, please stay."

He looked at me, his eyes no longer filled with fear. I looked back at him pleadingly. He smirked again and nipped at my nose, I bit his chin in response and he pulled my body closer to his. I already knew the answer as I smiled into his chest.

He wasn't afraid anymore.

_**It's all because of you…**_

It's all because of you…

It's all because of you …

End


End file.
